“It’s inevitable. Suddenly, all you’re aware of is that there are too many wet towels on the floor, he’s hogging the remote, and he’s scratching his back with a fork. Finally, you come face to face with the immutable truth that it’s virtually impossible to French-kiss a person who takes the new roll of toilet paper and leaves it resting on top of the empty cardboard roll. God forbid he takes the two seconds to replace it. Does he not see it? DOES HE NOT SEE IT?”(Reiner, 2000, The Story of Us)
Other people’s habits can be dead annoying can’t they – as this quote from the film The Story of Us shows. Psychological research says we all get more irritated by our partner’s habits over time. But does it have to be that way? The other person probably hasn’t developed new habits all of a sudden - but your thoughts towards them have changed.
Yet you can change your thoughts back again any time you like. Susan Jeffers (of Feel the Fear fame) writes about a woman who was irritated by her husband snoring every night. For a while she got angry. Then she stopped and said to herself, ‘How would I feel if he wasn’t here next to me as we sleep each night?’ She realised how precious he was and that, snoring or not, it was a wonderful thing to be curled up every night next to the man she loved. She changed her irritation to appreciation. Nothing had changed in the situation – only her perception of it.
UPDATEAs of 1st November 2006 Coaching support will be available to assist you from Monday to Friday, 9am -5pm 08700845836
British Summertime ended on Sunday, which gave us all an extra hour to play with. (OK, technically we’re just clawing back the hour we lost in spring but anyway…) So what did you do with it? And what does that say about you? Did you spend it watching TV? Exercising? Doing something you wouldn’t ordinarily do? Or did it mean more time in bed? Did you consciously think about having an extra hour or did it pass unnoticed? Just a few questions to get your mind whirring about what you might want to make more time for in future… Some of you shared your plans at the forum – Jessica said she’d like to do something totally random (playing golf). Liz opted for catching up with a friend and found how making one small change leads to bigger differences. Making that effort means she now has new plans for next weekend – and unforeseen fun ahead!
Ben and Karen logged on for a third live web chat on the 17th and what started off as a discussion about whether or not to accept a job offer, meandered through making tough decisions and how to be fearless. We ended up chewing the cud about the difference between an optimal life and an OK life - anything goes! And remember to come and join in next time - especially if you’ve never done ‘this web stuff’ on Wednesday 22nd November starting at 7.00 p.m...
Until then, keep doing it differently,
The nodietdietway Team
nodietdietway.com